What is Love? Five Theories on the World's Most Beautiful Feeling - Love at First Sight? Science Says It's Mostly Lust, Not Lasting Bonds

A new study from the University of Groningen challenges the idea of love at first sight. Researchers found that what people describe as instant love is mostly physical attraction rather than deeper emotional bonds. The findings suggest that true romantic connection develops over time, not in a single moment.

The study asked participants about their experiences of so-called love at first sight. Most reported feeling strong physical pull but little intimacy or commitment—key elements of lasting love. Psychologist Robert J. Sternberg had earlier defined love as a mix of three parts: closeness, passion, and dedication.

Evolutionary biologist Thomas Junker explained how hormones shape relationships. Testosterone and estrogen spark initial attraction, while dopamine drives infatuation. Oxytocin then helps form long-term bonds, a process shaped by evolution. According to Junker, these hormonal stages evolved to keep couples together for about four years—long enough to raise a child through early vulnerability.

Anthropologist Helen Fisher supports this view, suggesting humans may naturally seek one child per partner before moving on. She also noted that people can feel deep love for one person while being infatuated with another, offering evolutionary advantages. Psychologist Wolfgang Krüger added that real love grows from mutual understanding and a sense of belonging, not instant chemistry.

The research casts doubt on the idea of instantaneous love, linking strong attraction to biology rather than lasting bonds. Experts agree that true partnership requires time, shared experiences, and emotional investment. These findings may explain why many relationships shift or dissolve after a few years.